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Original Post:

Mar 4, 2025

Please help me, Lemmy.

I was staying at a friend’s for a month waiting for an affordable room to be available, only to move in and after a week see a bedbug.

It’s a single room, for poor people, with a shared kitchen.

I am poor, work remotely, and my financial situation is bad. I thought this could improve things.

I moved in a week ago, but didn’t move all my stuff in because it’s in boxes in my friend’s garage right now.

I have moved in with 2 outfits, 2 jackets, a work computer, some computer accessories, and have purchased 1 matress and pillow and bed sheet set at target.

The manager of the property beforehand said there haven’t been bed bugs for years, but one of the door has like a block over the bottom with powder in the doorway past the block to kill bugs as like a sort of trap. The manager said prior to my moving in this is just fear from 3 years ago. The units are very affordable and I had to be on a waitlist to get a unit.

I am not sure what to do. The place is mostly quiet and I could work here. I don’t love the area because although it’s low income rent, it’s in a high cost area with many food places nearby charging very high tourist amounts, like any burrito or sandwich is $13 at least. Rent is very low, however.

I could leave now before moving other stuff in, put my stuff in bags except for my work computer when getting back to my friends, and look for a different slightly more expensive place. I can’t stay with my friend long-term because her apartment is next to a distribution center with trucks pulling in and out all night and I wake up easily due to PTSD and always being on alert, even when sleeping. She sleeps through anything. I also don’t like ear-plugs and can’t sleep with them in. When I was staying there I was chronically tired.

Suggestions from Lemmy? How bad are bed bugs? It was only 1 but I squished it. Pest control coincidentally came that day and identified it is a bed bug.

Also, I have not paid rent for this month and it’s due by tomorrow. I could actually leave immediately, today even, and just not pay the rent. My credit is bad already and the money would be useful if it’s a mistake to stay. It’s sleazy to leave wirhout paying for this month, but I am poor and may not have the luxury of paying for a place that could result in a chronic bed bug infestation. I would also lose my deposit.

I also don’t know where it came from. I can’t be totally sure it didn’t come from my friend’s place although I stayed there 5 weeks and saw nothing bad. I also had purchased a new outfit from a store with vintage recycled clothes, like an upscale GoodWill store, but that was 2 weeks ago and there were no bites. It may not be from the new place, but I don’t think I was bitten before the move in. Strangely, I don’t even know if the bedbug I squished bit me. The pest control person said the city has many infestations and could have come from public transportation.

My friend lives 6 hours away by bus and I don’t know as many people there. It’s also a cheaper area and I could move there. I could actually just get a ticket and leave today if everything else is irrational.

I am very tired and don’t know what to think. The time at my friends impacted my mental health and I’m not sure I am seeing it rationally.

Comments

**ilmagico:**The problem is, if there’s bed bugs and you go somewhere else, it’s very likely they’ll attach to your belonging and hitch a hike to your new place… Best would be have the landlord take care of the issue, it is their responsibility after all.

If the landlord doesn’t cooperate, maybe you can tell them you’ll call pest control yourself and deduct the amount from the rent you owe… no idea how well that would go legally speaking, but maybe it’ll allow you some negotiating leverage. (obligatory IANAL)

OOP: If I stay, I won’t withhold rent. I am only withholding rent if I am leaving, and then I can say I left because it’s not habitable. These places are cheap and the legal costs of filing suit against me would not be worth recovery. They would keep my deposit and then I’d move on. It may be the rational thing to do, to just leave immediately.

grasshopper_mouse: Bed bugs are BAD. Where was the bug when you found it? Was it on you, the floor, your stuff? Was it alive or dead? Could you stay there a few more days without bringing the rest of your stuff from your friend’s place and see if more bugs appear?

Bed bugs spread quickly and can travel on you or your clothes and infest other locations. That being said, it may have just been one. Then again, if it came from the apartment next door, more will likely infiltrate your place. If they are coming from next door, it won’t be enough to spray just your apartment, the entire building will need it.

Sorry for the difficult situation you’re in, this is a tough call.

OOP: the bed bug was on my air mattress, on top of a target fitted sheet, below a larger target sheet used as a blanket. I saw it and squished it and blood came out. I don’t remember if it moved but seemed alive.

I could stay a few more days to see how it goes without bring more stuff in. But I would then need to pay this month’s rent or incur late fees and violate lease terms.

My stuff is all in a closet on shelves. The air mattress is on the ground. It could have come from another apartment. It may be that other residents know, but don’t want fumigation, hence the strange bug traps in front of a door and the white anti-bed-bug stuff sprinkled in front of another door. It could be the bugs come from the street, I slept with a windows open.

My room is almost empty so far.

Update:

Mar 10, 2025

fuck you spez

Now that that’s out of the way, here’s an exclusive Lemmy update on my horrible life with more questions.

After the last post, upon the advice of Lemmy, I put everything in trash bags, showered, and left with new clothes in shopping bags.

I changed into the new clothes in a Starbucks, at which the employees suspected I was an intravenous drug user and asked me if I was okay through the door, likely with Narcan in hand.

I told them I was fine, just washing my hands (which made no sense because I had been loudly placing things into garbage bags and opening sealed clothing packets in an echoey room without any water running). Then I continued to put more things in garbage bags, concealed slyly in large branded bags from Target.

Yes, they all thought I was a homeless junky, but it was actually much worse, and after over 10 minutes I emerged in a new sexy outfit, terrified that the police were being called, then grabbed my Frappachino and ran out.

I managed to get to the bus just in time.

All the bags were frozen for days and the contents washed. Everything was salvageable except my alarm clock radio which only plays static now and blinks strangely. It did not like being frozen and washed.

Since then, I have noticed 1 additional bite. I do not know if it was there before. I am terrified. Multiple days have passed since then, but it doesn’t prove I am safe since bed bugs can go days without feeding. If it turns out I still have them and may have spread them, I will deal with that guilt and agony when I know for sure.

I back with my friend but am now rethinking my approach, contemplating that I should have stayed at the bed bug place.

I did not end the tenancy when I left but did keep the cashier’s check that was the rent. I am still unsure of what to do.

I have a family member who is slowly dying in that area, I work remotely and expect I could lose my job any month, they’ve already gutted 90 percent of the department and I would expect other jobs will be next. I have survived many rounds of layoffs however. This family member lives in a small place and is somewhat crazy. I may not be able to see them if I am not in the area.

My credit has also taken a nosedive, so it will be very hard for me to rent something new. I’m considering going back and suffering instead of looking for something cheap here. I could probably get someone to cosign if I did look for a new place. I know no one in this area except my one friend who is not very social.

My head is completely messed up, even more than it was before. In the last post, people responded about the psychological devastation bed bugs cause. I am already there: 2 days of bed bugs and suddenly fleeing and I am on pins and needles, my normally mildly crazy brain gone extra bonkers with what ifs, fear, and suffering.

I am considering going back. The landlord won’t tell me how many treatments have been done in the past year. This seems concerning. I don’t know what to do. They did however do treatments to the room immediately after bed bugs were found, they said. I didn’t feel like they didn’t take it seriously, but am not entirely sure the building isn’t crawling with them all over in other rooms.

What would you do if you were me? Please, tell me Lemmy.

(in conclusion fuck spez)

Comments

Was_it_something_I_said: Bed bugs will only die from heat, not cold. You can put things in an industrial dryer at a Laundromat in high heat and it will kill them. That or not feeding them for over a year.

ch00f: Yeah, I think the cutoff is 122F which isn’t insanely high.

Mark Rober on the topic:

KingJalopy: There’s are a few reasonable responses in this thread but I’m a post control professional. If you want to feel free to message me and I’d be glad to tell you what you can do that will actually get rid of them. Diatomaceous Earth isn’t gonna cut it and cold will do nothing. You need heat and chemicals. They have likely laid eggs in the Tufts, or piping of the mattress. Pesticides won’t penetrate eggs so there is no one time treatment that will cure this. Even if you kill what’s alive you need to kill what hatches after before they lay more eggs. Insect growth regulators will also help. It will take time, patience, and professional grade products. If you can get your hands on crossfire or temprid those work best for bed bugs.

OOP: Would you recommend I return or is that too risky?

Keep in mind there are many, many small rooms there, over 50 likely.

KingJalopy: Oh if there’s that many rooms I would say it’s just gonna be a recurring issue unless they have hired a pest company to deal with this. I have a hotel account that I treat regularly. They have a legal obligation to do so if a customer complains but this is California. When we do find actual evidence of bed bugs we treat every room within 3 doors of that room even if it’s only the one room. They are prolific breeders and unless it’s being professionally addressed I wouldn’t risk it if you can avoid it.

I treat the entire hotel once a month and I still go there at least twice a month to address bed bugs when customers complain. Granted, at a hotel people are constantly coming and going and bringing them with them so it’s a constant battle.

Personally, I would find somewhere else unless the owner is proactively taking care of it. If not, you’ll be going through this more than once I can almost guarantee it.

Update in the Comments

Mar 13, 2025

I am considering going back more. The public health inspector I talked with said she last heard of a problem there in 2019, keep in mind this is an affordable housing place with 50+ units, and she said if there is pest control and they are doing treatments it doesn’t sound like a problem. Since many people there aren’t native English speakers, I unfortunately can’t easily ask many of the people who live there. Some of the other people seem a bit tough and I’m not sure how they would react to my approaching them.

I am really far away from most friends and family. I’m worried I may be making a mistake, especially if I were to suddenly get laid off. What if this is a treatable situation and I’m just overreacting?

Comments

MUTILATIONWAVE: You were being bitten by them. That’s an active infestation. People don’t just go pouring diatomaceous earth in doorways six years after there were bedbugs. I think you will regret living there. Health inspectors don’t know anything. They have no resources to inspect apartments. They can maybe make it to every restaurant twice a year in my experience.

OOPs last post was a year+ ago so we may never know what they decided to do. Marking this one as inconclusive

I am not the OOP

Do not message anyone mentioned in this post.